Chapter Thirty-Three: The Great India Decision
The morning started like any other.
Jay woke in Keifer's arms, warm and content. The sun streamed through the windows. Birds sang. Somewhere downstairs, Keiran was probably planning world domination with Rex.
Perfect.
Then her phone exploded.
Percy: EMERGENCY MEETING. EVERYONE. MANSION. 10AM. BRING SNACKS AND OPINIONS.
Jay: What kind of emergency?
Percy: THE BEST KIND. VACATION EMERGENCY.
Jay: Vacation emergency?
Percy: INDIA. WE'RE GOING TO INDIA. OR MAYBE WE'RE NOT. THAT'S THE EMERGENCY.
Jay: Percy. It's 7am.
Percy: EMERGENCIES DON'T HAVE SCHEDULES.
---
Jay showed Keifer the messages.
He groaned, pulling the pillow over his head. "Ignore him. He'll forget by noon."
"He's already sent seventeen messages."
"He always sends seventeen messages."
"He's recruited Honey. She just sent 'Please come. He won't stop pacing.'"
Keifer emerged from the pillow, resigned. "We're going, aren't we?"
"We're going."
---
By nine-thirty, the mansion was chaos.
Percy arrived first, dragging Honey behind him. He was already mid-argument with someone on the phone.
"I don't CARE if October is peak season! We're going in October! BOOK IT!"
Honey patted his arm. "Babe, we haven't even decided if we're going."
"WE'RE GOING. I'VE DECIDED."
"You're one person."
"I'M THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON."
Aries and Ella arrived next, looking significantly more put-together. Aries carried coffee. Ella carried a notebook.
"Percy's lost his mind," Ella announced. "He called us at six."
"SIX? He called us at five!"
"He's been planning this for weeks. He just forgot to tell anyone."
---
C.N. and Rakii showed up with David and Freya in tow.
"Someone explain," C.N. demanded. "I got a text that said 'INDIA OR DEATH.' That's it."
Percy emerged from his phone call. "INDIA! WE'RE GOING TO INDIA!"
"Why?"
"Because—" He stopped. "Actually, I don't remember. But it's a great idea!"
Yuri arrived, cameras ready. "Documenting the great India decision. For posterity."
Mica and Calix burst through the door next, Mica already talking. "INDIA! I've always wanted to go! Taj Mahal! Spicy food! Elephants!"
"There won't be elephants, probably."
"THERE BETTER BE ELEPHANTS."
Felix and Bridget came last, looking slightly overwhelmed by the chaos.
"What did we miss?" Bridget asked.
"Percy wants to go to India," Jay summarized.
"Is that bad?"
"Nothing is bad. It's just... Percy."
---
Keifer appeared in the doorway, Keiran on his hip. "Can someone explain why my house is full at ten in the morning?"
"INDIA!" Percy shouted.
Keiran's eyes lit up. "India? Where India?"
"It's a country, buddy. Very far away."
"Can Rex come?"
"Rex can come."
Keiran nodded, satisfied. "Then India good."
Percy pointed at him. "KEIRAN GETS IT. KEIRAN IS ON BOARD. THE REST OF YOU NEED TO CATCH UP."
---
The debate began.
Percy stood at the front of the living room like a general addressing troops. He'd found a whiteboard somewhere and had drawn a very questionable map of India.
"Okay. Here's the plan. Two weeks. Maybe three. We hit all the major spots—Delhi, Agra, Jaipur, Mumbai, Goa—"
"That's five cities in two weeks," Aries interrupted. "That's insane."
"It's EFFICIENT."
"It's exhausting."
Percy pointed at him. "You're exhausting."
Ella raised her hand. "What about hotels? Flights? Budget?"
Percy waved dismissively. "Details."
"Details are important."
"Details are boring."
C.N. stepped in. "Okay, let's break this down logically. First question: Why India?"
Percy paused. "Because... it's exotic?"
"We live in the Philippines. Everything is exotic."
"India is DIFFERENT exotic."
"Not helpful."
---
Keifer cleared his throat. "I have a private jet."
Everyone stopped.
Percy spun around. "WHAT?"
"I have a private jet. Actually, I have two. But one is currently being serviced. The other is available."
"You have a PRIVATE JET?"
"Yes. For business. But we can use it for the trip."
Percy's face went through approximately seventeen expressions. "You've had a private jet this WHOLE TIME and you never OFFERED?"
"You never asked."
"I'm asking NOW. WE'RE TAKING THE JET."
Keifer looked at Jay. She shrugged.
"The jet seats twelve comfortably," he said. "Thirteen if we squeeze. Keiran on laps."
Keiran raised his hand. "Rex needs seat?"
"Rex can share with you."
"Rex happy."
Percy was already doing calculations. "Twelve seats. Twelve people. We have—" He counted. "Us. Jay and Keif. Aries and Ella. Me and Honey. C.N. and Rakii. David and Freya. Mica and Calix. Felix and Bridget. That's—"
"Fourteen," Aries supplied. "Fourteen people."
Percy's face fell. "Fourteen? That's too many."
"Math is hard."
Yuri raised his hand. "I'm coming too. That's fifteen."
"YURI!"
"What? I document everything. You need documentation."
C.N. raised an eyebrow. "Fifteen people. Twelve seats. Someone's not going."
---
The chaos intensified.
Percy grabbed the whiteboard. "Okay, elimination round. Who's least essential?"
"Everyone's essential," Honey protested.
"Essential to the TRIP, not to life. Big difference."
Mica grabbed the marker from him. "I'm essential. I bring the fun."
"You bring chaos."
"Same thing."
Felix spoke quietly. "I can stay behind if needed."
Bridget grabbed his arm. "Absolutely not. If you stay, I stay."
"That's romantic but unhelpful for numbers."
C.N. crossed his arms. "Rakii and I can skip. We've been to India before."
"YOU'VE BEEN TO INDIA AND DIDN'T TELL US?"
"You never asked."
"WHY DOES NO ONE TELL ME THINGS?"
---
Keiran tugged Keifer's sleeve. "Pappa? Why Tito Percy yelling?"
"Because Tito Percy is dramatic, buddy."
"Oh." Keiran thought. "Like cartoon?"
"Exactly like cartoon."
"Cartoons funny. Tito Percy funny."
Percy heard this. "I'm being compared to a cartoon by a three-year-old."
"Happens to the best of us," Honey said.
---
Keifer stood, commanding attention. "Everyone. Stop."
They stopped.
"The jet has twelve seats. We have fifteen people. But we don't all have to go at the same time. The jet can make multiple trips."
Percy's face lit up. "Multiple trips?"
"It's a four-hour flight to India. I can fly people in shifts. First group goes, second group follows later in the day. Easy."
"You're a GENIUS."
"I've been saying that for years."
Yuri raised his hand. "I'm going in the first group. For maximum content."
"Of course you are."
---
The debate shifted from "who goes" to "who goes when."
Percy demanded first group. So did Mica. So did Yuri. So did basically everyone.
"I NEED to be first!" Percy argued. "I'm the trip planner!"
"You're self-appointed trip planner," Aries corrected.
"Self-appointed is still appointed!"
Keifer looked at Jay. "This is going to take hours."
"Probably."
"Want to make a run for it?"
"And miss the show? Never."
---
C.N. took control. "Okay, here's how it works. First group: people with the least patience. That's Percy, Mica, Yuri, and anyone who wants to escape them."
"HEY!"
"It's strategic. Get the chaos people there first so they can burn off energy while the rest of us travel in peace."
Percy considered this. "That's... actually smart."
"I'm always smart."
Second group: people who need sleep. That's Freya, Felix, Bridget, and anyone else who values peace."
Freya nodded. "Acceptable."
Third group: everyone else, spread out however."
Rakii raised her camera. "I need good light for arrival photos. When's the best light?"
"It's INDIA. The light is always good."
"False. I need specifics."
---
Keiran tugged Keifer's sleeve again. "Pappa? Rex wants first group."
"Rex wants to be with the chaos people?"
"Rex loves chaos."
Jay laughed. "Rex is very wise."
Keiran nodded. "Rex knows things."
Percy grabbed Keiran. "KEIRAN! You're in my group! We're going to have the BEST time!"
"Tito Percy, put me down!"
"NEVER! WE'RE ADVENTURE BUDDIES NOW!"
Honey watched her boyfriend running around with a three-year-old on his hip. "He's going to be exhausted by the time we actually leave."
"That's future Percy's problem."
---
The arguments continued.
Hotels were debated. Itineraries argued over. Percy created seventeen different versions of the schedule, each more chaotic than the last.
Aries tried to impose order. C.N. tried to apply logic. Yuri filmed everything. Rakii took approximately nine hundred photos.
Keifer held Jay and Keiran, watching the madness.
"Your family is insane," he murmured.
"Our family," she corrected. "And yes. Completely."
"But we're going, aren't we?"
She looked at the chaos—her brothers, her friends, her found family, all arguing passionately about a vacation that was actually happening.
"Yeah," she said, smiling. "We're going."
Keiran cheered. "INDIA! REX AND ME AND PAPPA AND MAMMA AND EVERYONE! ON PAPPA'S BIG PLANE!"
Percy spun around. "KEIRAN GETS IT! KEIRAN IS THE ONLY SANE ONE HERE!"
"He's three."
"THREE AND SANER THAN ALL OF YOU!"
---
By evening, a plan had formed.
First group: Percy, Honey, Mica, Calix, Yuri, and Keiran (with Rex, non-negotiable).
Second group: Freya, Felix, Bridget, C.N., Rakii, and David.
Third group: Jay, Keifer, Aries, and Ella. (And whoever else got tired of waiting.)
Percy was already packing. "I need India clothes! Turbans! Elephant pants! So many options!"
"Percy, we're not leaving for months."
"MONTHS IS NOT ENOUGH TIME!"
Keiran ran to pack his own bag. "Rex! We need India clothes! Rex needs tiny turban!"
Jay looked at Keifer. "We're going to have to find Rex a tiny turban."
"Absolutely not."
"Keif. Your son. Tiny dinosaur. Tiny turban. It's happening."
He sighed. "Fine. But Percy's paying."
---
As everyone finally filtered out, exhausted but excited, Jay stood on the patio with Keifer.
"We're really doing this," she said.
"We're really doing this."
"Three weeks. Fifteen people. One three-year-old. A stuffed dinosaur with fashion demands."
"And Rex."
"Can't forget Rex."
He pulled her close. "You know this is going to be chaos, right?"
"The best kind of chaos."
"The kind that ends with someone in a foreign jail."
"Probably Percy."
"Definitely Percy."
They watched the last car disappear down the driveway.
"Keif?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you. For the jet. For making this possible. For everything."
He kissed her forehead. "You're welcome. But warn me before Rex starts making fashion demands."
"No promises."
Inside, Keiran was already "packing" — which meant throwing every toy he owned into a bag.
"Rex! We need swimsuit! India has swimming?"
"Probably, buddy."
"Rex needs floaties!"
Jay looked at Keifer. "Rex needs floaties now."
"I'm not buying floaties for a dinosaur."
"Tell that to Rex."
Keiran appeared in the doorway, Rex held high. "Rex says if no floaties, Rex not go."
Keifer stared at the dinosaur. Then at his son. Then at Jay.
"I'm buying floaties."
"Good choice."
---
End of Chapter Thirty-Three